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    October 16

    最经有点“茫”

         失望

          最近心里一直有种憋屈的感觉,大一结束了,每个人都在收获自己这一年的成果——申请奖学金、入党、申请个人荣誉……!而我却只能傻傻地站在一旁呆呆的遥望,痴痴地幻想,心中难免有种莫名奇妙地伤悲。我不知道自己大学究竟需要的是什么,在这里我真的好自由,独立、坚强快要压得我喘不过气,来茫茫的人海中我真的要迷失自己了,我想要的大学生活到底是什么……每次走在空旷的校园里望着来来往往的忙碌的人群,听到嬉笑的声音有种恐惧的感觉,每当夜幕降临时真的犹如死亡慢慢向我走来……。时光荏苒,毕业的钟声即将敲响,我只是匆匆路过的过客,这里不属于我而我的未来又在何方?流落街头?重新开始更高的新的人生征程?我不敢想像,我怕……也许我知道该去做什么但我现在只想沉浸在音乐中,忘记自己,忘记周围的一切!也许我真的只是一只小丑--努力在人们面前表演去赢得别人的掌声!

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